Prayer

I am in an interesting place today, finding myself pulled to prayer. I think it may be a natural part of my intentions to slow my life down. In the past, I have always been too busy to stop and sit, to stop and pray, to stop and ponder the world in which I live, but since I got sick in March, I have been rather intentional in slowing down.

Now a lot of the intention has been in the same class as slowing down the Titanic---it has taken a while for the desire to slow down to actually have an effect on the object to be slowed, but it is happening. I feel better than I have felt in years, and although the periods of complete chaos still descend upon me on occasion, I feel different, like the chaos is swirling around me instead of my being a part of the chaos! I like that because it allows me to function with a degree of peace. I feel like I am in control of my life instead of being a leaf on the wind.

I am really not in control, though, because God is in control of it all, and part of the chaos comes from my resistance to that control. When I am called to prayer, I am called to a place where I am not fighting the pilot for the controls.

So it is a good day, a good life, a good place to be....it is my prayer that it will continue.