Knees and Cows and Other Things

The other day I was on my way to Brookings to pick up another prescription. It was one of those days where the clouds were here and there and the sun was in and out. I came around a corner just as the clouds broke, allowing the sun to strike a field near the highway. Green is a weak word to describe the field...it was GREEN! It has been raining, so things around here are springtime green, so when the sun hits it, it is wonderful. Making it even more wonderful was the presence of a small herd of Jersey cows in the field. Their golden brown coats glistened in stark contrast to the green. As they moved in the dance of grazing, the gold rippled against the green; it was an amazing sight.

While I watched them, I remembered another day, another field, and another herd of cattle. It was probably thirty years ago in a poppy-filled pasture near Hollister, California. The green was not visible because of the carpet of brilliant orange poppies, and grazing in the middle of the poppies was a small herd of Black Angus cows. Once again it was the contrast; placid black up to their stomachs in golden orange. I was on a motorcycle at the time, and it was time to pull over and simply drink in the scene. I am so grateful for the colorful palette of nature!

So the knee business is right around the corner. I am a bit anxious, but I have a great surgeon, and I will be in a great hospital. I have a good attitude about what I have to do to make this happen, and most of all, God is with me. My mantra shall be that everything will turn out exactly as it is supposed to and all will be well. Besides, I get six weeks to be a passenger and look out the window at the most beautiful world...a blessing in its own right!

The Next One Is for Real

I missed Friday, my normal writing day, because I was not capable of writing. I was not capable of stringing two coherent thoughts together. I had a feeling when the doctor wanted to double the dosage of the previous drug trial, the one that worked just fine, thank you very much, that there was going to be a problem, and man! Did I ever hit the nail on the head! When my blood pressure hit 90/63 and I could not stay awake, it was time to quit. The trial did stop the pain, but it stopped everything else as well! I am willing to suffer a little in exchange for thinking!!

So the next drug trial is for real. Another tree died for my sake, as I travelled to Grants Pass today to fill out another ream or so of paperwork. The whole experience is gaining reality now, and while I am a tiny bit nervous, I am not anxious. I learned long ago, when I was climbing the walls in anticipation of another surgery, that everything will happen exactly as it is supposed to happen and all will be well. If I believe in turning my will and life over to the care of God, then I believe that God will take care of me now and in the future. I just want to get it done so I can get on with rehab and get on with my life!

I want to do three things after my knee is fixed: I want to go walking in the redwoods, on any trail I choose, not just the flat accessible ones; I want to play nine holes of golf at the little course where Zach and I play and not be hobbling when I finish; I want to take my dog to the beach and walk with her---right now the unevenness of the sand is just too painful. Course, I am also thinking about learning to cross-country ski next winter, but I will have to bounce that one off the doctor first! In short, I used to be very into physical activity, and I want to go there again. I don't think that is asking too much!